Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Disconnecting

More and more, I'm finding myself not wanting to be on social media. I've wanted to get back to blogging more, and so I really should work towards that, as well as getting my ass in gear for NaPoWriMo next month, as I always do. I have been reading as much as possible. I'm enjoying the disconnect. I'm going to try my hand at some fiction...short stories, which is what I used to do back in the day. I'm doing it for shits and giggles and to get a few things out of me that I'd rather not do in poetry...characters, anyway. They are all pieces of me, in some way or shape, anyway. As for Facebook and Twitter...I would like to use them more as tools for plugging my work. My poetry is who I am and what I do and I need to keep bashing people over the head with that until they realize that. Perhaps...someone will give a shit. I'm betting the opposite, but that's because my self confidence and self esteem has always been dog shit. Couple that with the depression I live with and well...it's a giant dog shit smoothie. And speaking of poetry...

I know that there are cliques. This is been going on since the beginning of time. As a life long outsider, I find it hard to connect with a lot of other poets. Sometimes I can, but this is a rarity. It has always seemed to me that, for as much as I try to build things within the poetic community, it's often brushed aside or disregarded. I see some people (and NO, I would never name names) who don't really put in the blood and sweat into their craft getting ahead, and honestly, it pisses me off. Do the work. Give a shit about the craft, about all the scenes. Don't live in a house of mirrors. Read other poets voraciously. Be selfless and humble. Never forget where you came from. I will always, no matter how small (they are never big) my successes are, keep a level of humility. The other thing that I see, especially from some poets on Facebook, is that there are certain cliques that scoff at and put down others, to the point of mocking and discrediting those who don't fit in their little fucking jar of what they believe poetry to be. I give a hearty "FUCK YOU" to those poets. You are not the emperors of poetic form. Your jealousy and high school cattiness can eat a bag of dicks.  

Anyway...I have a pile of books on my desk and more piled on the bookshelves. I keep buying books, taking books out from the library...it's a sickness, but one that I'd rather not cure. Maybe you'll see me here more. Maybe, whoever you are out there who actually reads this fucking blog, will give a fuck and a half. Also, I have a new chapbook out from Indigent Press called "Into The Undertow", if you're interested. I'm very happy with how it came out. Much love to Charles Joseph for all of his hard work. 

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